Recap of the year so far

When I look back on the first post from this year it's clear that I started 2024 with tremendous optimism. I had a feeeling it would be an year I would look back on and cherish. Something in the air just felt ...exciting.  

Now almost mid-way through, I can say I am still looking at it with optimism. But this optimism is more to propel myself and come out of what has been probabaly a very challenging time.

Unexpecetedly early in the year, I went down a path hoping for a peaceful end to a rocky journey that stretched for a decade and a half. At the beginning, the path did feel green and peaceful and promised me the destination I set out to find. But towards the end I had to face unexpected things, thanks to fate. I set out to fight the problem and emerge out of it happy, and possibly make others happy in the process...but that did not happen. Not everything is a one woaman show - sometimes you need a partner, or a team. And if they are not on the same page as you the destination would never be reached, even worser you'd realize you are on the wrong route. 

When I look back at the past few months I know I gave it my best shot. There were things I never though I would have to go through, but I went through them and I tried to make the best of it. I had the guts to fight for what was fair, but it did not work out. But I am at peace knowing that I gave it my best. 

I had the confidence that I would make things agreeable for those involved and not cause long term damage to anyone. But not everyone had that trust in me. So I decided to give up what was supposed to be journey of a lifetime. And in the process I brought back peace, hopefully to everyone. For what good is a win if it comes at the loss of everyone around you? Sometimes you gotta take one for the team :). One thing I realized was this >> I don't deserve to stick to a team that asks me to take punches simply beacuse it thinks I am strong enough and because I had done it once before. So, I have seperated myself from it now. It wasn't easy and still has me going through the motions and after effects, but it was needed to be done. 

I've worked hard throughout my life, unintentionally...not deliberatly, on keeping healthy realtionships around me that are now a strong support system for me. So thanks to them and my own self, I will survive, again....